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LUCKY GIRL SYNDROME

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#LuckyGirlSyndrome has become the latest TikTok trend in 2023, but what is Lucky Girl Syndrome exactly? We'll take a look at what this is, how we can learn from it, and of course, the psychology behind it.




What is Lucky Girl Syndrome?


You've heard of manifestation right? Manifestation is the concept of turning your dreams and ideas into reality, by intention. You have to think about what you want, and you have to put in work for it to become true. We all 'manifest' to a degree, e.g., thinking of what we want to eat for dinner, and then cooking it (or ordering in). Some people apply this to actual goals such as buying a dream car, getting good grades, travelling, and even just being happy. It's all about mindset. Lucky Girl Syndrome is simply just manifestation. You have to be able to change your mindset, which in turn changes your behaviours and actions to those that can help you in the process of achieving your dreams and ideas.


A person who adopts the Lucky Girl mindset would say something along the lines of:

"I am capable of achieving what I want and more."

If you believe you can achieve whatever you want and you have an open-mind, you're going to believe that, and your actions will change accordingly such as taking opportunities, meeting new people, and instead of watching TV show reruns, learning a skill or hobby. The Lucky Girl mindset is where you believe that your possibilities are infinite. It's about opening up avenues to explore and even running into those you didn't know existed. Don't expect to see results if you stick to your current habits and routines. You are in charge of your beliefs and how you see things.


On the other hand, if you believe that you can't achieve, there's only one route to 'success', the world is a bad place, and everything takes a hell of a lot of effort to do, you're going to believe that. And so, your behaviours in reality will be a reflection of those thoughts and beliefs, which in turn will make you feel ultimately unsatisfied and upset. A mindset like this will only hold you back from your potential. It's as simple as that from a social media standpoint.







What is the psychology behind Lucky Girl Syndrome?


In terms of psychology, the manifestation we hear about on social media fits into the realm of 'pop' (popular) psychology, topics related to psychology that make it big in society originating from social media and well, the media itself. Manifestation is actually a pseudoscience; it's not backed up by evidence, but it's cool and fun to talk about on your coffee break. It's not good for psychology to be associated with such because a long term goal of psychology is to be taken seriously as a real science, with real research, involving real scientific methods...! Don't even start about MBTI (Read here: How does MBTI relate to our fashion choices?). However, there are many similar concepts closely related to manifestation, motivation, and attaining goals that psychologists have been using in therapy, educational settings, work settings, and other areas. Try and see how a few apply to Lucky Girl Syndrome, you'll be surprised.


Growth Mindset


The growth mindset is a theory in 'positive psychology' where if you believe that you can do something, you're more likely to do that something successfully regardless of talent, intelligence, or education - You just need to put in the work. Dweck (2006) termed it, the psychology of success. Having a growth mindset means that your skills and abilities have the opportunity to develop rather than staying fixed and unchangeable. This mindset can make you resilient to setbacks because you believe that you always have opportunities to learn and experience. How to use the growth mindset? The key is to take fixed mindset beliefs and associate them with growth and learning instead. If you catch yourself saying something along the lines of "I'm not seeing results!", add 'yet' to the end of that statement.


Self-fulfilling Prophecy


The term self-fulfilling prophecy is simply when a person's expectations or beliefs about an event influences their behaviour to match that of the expectations or beliefs. To put it simply, if you think you're unlovable, you're going to act unlovable and push everyone away. If you believe that you're never going to get your dream job, you're not going to put effort into getting it or take appropriate actions to get it, making it more likely that you'll not get that job. This is similar to confirmation bias.


Self-determination Theory


Self-determination theory is a framework to understand internal factors that motivate us and shape how we behave (Ryan & Deci, 2017). We have three basic psychological needs: autonomy, competence, and connectedness. When they're met, they lead to greater motivation and life satisfaction. Autonomy is when we control our own behaviour and actions. Competence refers to growing and learning new skills that are important to us. Connectedness refers to interacting with others.


Locus of Control


Locus of control is an individual difference concerning how we understand and perceive events and circumstances. This can be internal (i.e., what happens to me is determined by my own behaviours and actions) and external (i.e., what happens to me is determined by other people, society, chance, the 'universe', and maybe even spiritual forces). Our lives are determined by both internal and external factors, and it's important to keep in mind that what might apply to you, might not apply to someone else. (Read more: Stressed out about work? Learn how to deal with it). An internal locus of control is associated with more positive outcomes according to many studies (Iles-Caven et al., 2020). When we believe that fate will determine what happens to us, we don't take the initiative to work towards our goals nor feel connected to what we want, nor what we are doing. It's like expecting someone else to do the work for you.


Where is research heading in terms of manifestation itself?


Surprisingly, there has been research on the psychology of belief in manifestation (i.e., Dixon et al., 2022). The researchers explored the psychology of those who believe in manifestation in three studies. They developed a 'Manifestation Scale', and participants who scored higher on it perceived themselves as more successful and believed they were more likely to achieve success in the future as well. They were more likely to be drawn to risk, experience debt, and believe that an unlikely level of success could be achieved pretty fast. Research is never 100 per cent reliable and/or valid, and we should never walk away accepting conclusions for what they are. It's important to take such research and evaluate it. Firstly, manifestation is hard to define, the scale is new, and the small sample size (N = 1023) is ethnocentric (USA-focused). However, it's a good basis for further research on this topic.












How can I get the Lucky Girl Syndrome mindset?


Remember, if you have goals that you want to achieve, you have to put the effort in yourself. Here are some things to keep in mind to achieve your goals based on the original idea of Lucky Girl Syndrome and the evidence-based concepts and theories in psychology as discussed previously.

  1. You're going to know what exactly it is that you want to bring into your life and write it down somewhere. This could be on your phone, a piece of paper, or in a journal. Write about whatever you want no matter how big or small, write however many goals you want as long as they do no harm, make you happy, make you feel in control, and feels right to you. You have to be able to know exactly what you want so that you know you achieved exactly that.

  2. You're going to make these goals clearer for yourself - Understand what it is exactly that you want, when you want it, and if you have a plan. It's alright to say you want the latest designer items, but what does that really mean to you? A handbag? Sunglasses? What brand? What colour? Why do you want it in the first place? How much do you need to save up?

  3. You're going to accept opportunities, don't just 'be open' to accepting them. Put yourself out there, learn new skills that you find fun and engaging.

  4. You're going to apply to opportunities whether you're suited towards them or not, what's the worst that could happen? If you don't succeed move on and you might find an even better opportunity afterwards. Put it this way, let's say if you want to get your dream internship - If you submit your application, you have a higher chance of succeeding compared to not doing an application at all, right? If you actually buy a lottery ticket, you have a higher chance of winning the lottery than someone who hasn't got a ticket, right? It's that simple.

  5. You're going to be realistic, but this doesn't mean you need to engage in negative self-talk. Although Lucky Girl Syndrome is based on reducing self-limiting beliefs, you don't have to treat them as 'self-limiting beliefs'. Instead, incorporate them into your goal setting - think about how you can overcome them. Do your research on how to achieve specific goals - See how others have achieved it and apply this to your goal setting. Learn the skills required. If you're way too optimistic, you're going to eventually lose momentum.

  6. You're going to remember that there is no one way to achieving your goals, you might find an alternative along the way, or something you enjoy more.

  7. You're going to persevere and test your patience - We're used to instant gratification, and unfortunately goals aren't achieved overnight. Keep believing and you'll find ways to get to where you want.

  8. You're going to follow people and accounts that inspire you, motivate you, match your beliefs, and make you want to be a better version of yourself.

  9. You're not going to be envious of others or want to be a particular person. You are you.

  10. You're going to be grateful and be happy with what you have already. Doing this will keep in a positive frame of mind and motivated to achieve more.

  11. You're going to create a vision board. Visualisation is powerful and has been shown to be effective in sports (Predoiu et al., 2020). Creating a vision board is a fun and simple way to keep your goals in mind and keep you happily motivated. Take a look online at images (or your own) that resemble your goals and then just put them all together. You can make a physical vision board by sticking pictures to a board or you can make a digital one using PowerPoint or Word. If that's not your thing, just create a new photos folder on your phone and keep the pictures there so they are in one place. As an example, if you don't know where to start, if you want to be happy let's say, you could find a picture of a smiley face. Want to go to cafés more this year? Include a picture of a café and imagine yourself being in that picture. The trick here is to look back at this board every now and again to remind yourself of your dreams and to also see what you've achieved so far. Keep it in mind, but don't feel the need to have to look at it everyday.

  12. You're not going to be constantly attached to your goals - Check them once in a while.


What are the drawbacks of having the Lucky Girl Syndrome mindset?


One thing to remember is that just writing down a goal and not doing anything about it won't make it come true, unless you put in the work. Although Lucky Girl Syndrome is about believing you can achieve every single thing and reducing self-limiting beliefs, you need to be realistic, and you will think about the pros and cons of getting there. We evaluate decisions we make to keep us safe. Also, it's inevitable that you'll become disheartened if you can't reach your goals or they don't seem like they're getting closer, and that's OK, it will help you in future planning.


It can be very easy to get carried away with the manifestation you learn via social media if you are going through a tough period in your life or if you have a mental health disorder. If you find yourself becoming too interested or pre-occupied with trying to fulfil your goals - it's wise to step away. It shouldn't interfere with your daily life nor make it miserable.


Manifestation is a journey and not a quick fix for your problems.


Not every single thing that happens to you is a product of manifestation or can be manifested, good or bad.


Keep your goals to yourself or with your closest friends and family, because this way, you'll have no one to talk you out of your goals and dreams, and make you feel incapable of achieving them. We have quite a lot of potential to achieve anything we want, but we're usually told we can't or not to bother trying.


Don't take what you see on social media seriously. The 'Lucky Girl Syndrome' that you learn about on social media has its own flaws (e.g., Do bad things happen to me because I thought of them? Why do some people of certain backgrounds achieve greater results? Etc.).


Conclusion


Having goals is a wonderful thing; it keeps us curious, motivated, and it gives us something to do. In order to achieve our goals, fulfil our wants and needs, and turn our ideas into reality, we need to be able to take control of our own actions and change our mindset from believing that dreaming is enough, to actually doing with belief in ourselves that we can do whatever we want when we put our mind towards it. Curiosity is the best outfit. Work it.



 

References


Dixon, L. J., Hornsey, M., Hartley, N. (2022). The secret to success? The psychology of belief in manifestation. https://doi.org/10.13140/RG.2.2.18696.90881


Dweck, C. S. (2006). Mindset: The new psychology of success. Random House.


Iles-Caven, Y., Gregory, S., Ellis, G., Golding, J., & Nowicki, S. (2020). The Relationship Between Locus of Control and Religious Behavior and Beliefs in a Large Population of Parents: An Observational Study. Frontiers in psychology, 11, 1462. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.01462


Predoiu, R., Predoiu, A., Mitrache, G.,... et al. (2020). Visualisation techniques in sport–the mental road map for success. Physical Education, Sport and Kinetotherapy Journal, 59(3), 245-256.


Ryan, R. M. & Deci, E. L. (2017). Self-determination theory: Basic psychological needs in motivation, development, and wellness. The Guilford Press. https://doi.org/10.1521/978.14625/28806


Worth, P. & Smith, M. D. (2019). Positive Psychology And Luck Experiences in The Routledge Handbook of the Philosophy and Psychology of Luck (1st Ed.). Routledge.

4 comentarios


Invitado
14 may 2023

Wow I never looked at it that way. I think I want to start vision board and say yes to things more because really if you don't go out of comfort zone then why

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Invitado
24 abr 2023

💞💞💞💞💞

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Invitado
26 feb 2023

Thank you 🍑

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Invitado
20 feb 2023

Finally! I've been waiting for this post for so long. It's rational how you put it. You don't just literally write something down and expect it happen without doing the grind. Like, I've seen so many loa videos online and it doesn't make any sense to me. Sending love!

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